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Have you heard the phrase, “You can be anyone/anything you want to be” or the other famous one, “You can do anything you set your mind to”? These phrases are everywhere. Actually, I’ve used them multiple times. Pretty much all the self-help books out there dedicate a large part of their messages to reinforce the concept that our inner power has no limit and we can do or be whatever we want.
I love the idea of thinking that my inner power is unlimited. I love to push myself beyond my limits, and I truly believe in my abilities. But (yes, I am adding a ‘but’ here … hear/read me out for a moment) I have always asked myself, “If it’s true that I can be anyone I want to be or do anything I set my mind to, why can’t I (for example) have a beautiful voice to sing opera?” I mean, I know I could dedicate my life to learn singing techniques and all that, but in reality, I simply don’t have the voice to sing opera. I recognize that consistency and hard work can trump talent in many areas, but when it comes to certain abilities, even when we do our best to get them to the next level, we don’t have the intrinsic talent required to do so.
I promise you I’m not being negative, here. I have a point! I’m currently reading an awesome book: The Great Work of Your Life by Stephen Cope. In it, Cope uses the Bhagavad Gita (one of Hinduism’s holy scriptures) as the primary reference to elaborate his own message. I haven’t finished the book yet (I promise to share my thoughts about it as soon as I do), but so far I’m amazed by one particular part, where he tells how Krishna, one of the characters in the Gita, explains in detail why we can’t actually be anyone/anything we want to be.
A common concept in Indian religions such as Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism, Sikhris, etc., is called ‘dharma.’ This concept has no direct translation, but the closest meaning is ‘righteousness, merit, or religious and moral duties governing individual conduct.’ In short, practitioners view dharma as each person’s individual call and/or purpose in life. So, Krishna explains that you can’t be anyone you want to be; you need to be yourself. You were sent to this world with your dharma already established, so you have no need to want or try to be anyone else.
Some people know their dharma, and they live to fulfill it. These are the happiest people on Earth. Even when they have difficulties in life, they seem to understand that those situations aren’t permanent; they’re merely part of the journey. Other people don’t know their dharma, and they keep looking to feel fulfilled by testing different paths. They may be successful in those paths, but they don’t feel fulfilled. So, they keep moving around looking for the true meaning of life.
When I read this part of the book, I immediately linked it with my own questions about the things I’m not able to do. To be honest with you, I felt relieved. Please don’t misunderstand me; I’m not saying I’m going to stop pushing myself beyond my limits. I know we’re all capable of more than we think. What I’m saying is that we must use our magnificent capacities in the right direction. We must fulfill our dharma and be who we are. We must embrace our inner self because that’s the only one who will give us joy.
For the people who know their purpose or dharma, life may sound easy—just be you and do what fulfills you. However, I know that for many of us, it’s not as easy as it sounds. Some people keep looking for that answer everywhere, and others don’t even know they need to look for it. How can any of us find our dharma when we’re all constantly bombarded by social media with its different ideas, perspectives, and theories? One day you might think you should be as fit as Senada Greca, and on other days you may think you need to be as funny as George Harris. At the end of the day, the easiest thing to do is just be yourself, but do you actually know who you are?
When I started meditating, I found the answer to that question for myself. I’m not saying you have to start meditating if you’re not sure yet what your dharma is, but it worked for me. Maybe if you start asking yourself who you’re not, you’ll get the correct answer. You can do many different things to find your own dharma. The most important step is to realize that if you don’t feel completely fulfilled, you need to start looking to be the truest you.
The key to a joyful life is feeling fulfilled, my friends. The only way to feel completely fulfilled is by being you and embracing your dharma. I’m going to add a phrase from Cope’s book that reached out and grabbed me: “It is better to fail at your own dharma than to succeed at the dharma of someone else.” The short takeaway? Be you!
Love,
Irene